FML.

Every time I write the abbreviation "fml" it has to have the period afterwards.  Caps is also kind of mandatory.

Anyhow, onto why I should eff my life- expense.
Life is expensive.  At least when you try to buy things that entertain you.  Also, it seems like they come one after the other.  You don't get a break!

I decided I want a ferret.  It's going to cost me over $600 for the ferret and all of it's necessities.  That's okay because I'm willing to save for it.
Then, my phone starts malfunctioning more than usual.  I've known since about three months after I got my phone that it sucks.  (Note to readers: don't buy the LG Optimus V.  Apparently, there's a reason it was on sale for $99.)
Then, there's a strategically placed Virgin Mobile- my service provider- ad that is advertising the iPhone 4S. New for Virgin Mobile customers!  Lovely.  I had an iPhone 3GS when I was with AT&T; back then it was around $300.  The bill for AT&T just became too much for my mom.  After all, she was paying hers and her two daughters' on one income.  It's a little tight-budgeted.
To make it easier on her, I switched to Virgin Mobile because they have reasonable service in my area for only $35 a month.  That is unlimited text, internet, and 300 minutes.  Since I despise talking on the phone, this plan was perfect for me.
Then, I see the phone I now have, Optimus V, and it's on sale!  Coincidence?  Government conspiracy?  Aliens?  In any case, I thought it was my lucky day.  I wish I'd just... I don't know... somehow found another iPhone for another carrier or something.  This new phone isn't worth the money.

I'm telling you guys, it's super slow, freezes all the time, and gives me the "failed application" message at least three times a day.  I've cleared it off of all my content and it still runs like a piece of crap.  To add to the poop pile of the Optimus V, I haven't even had it for a year!  Don't tell me that it's worth the $100.

So, uhrm, anyway... when I saw the iPhone ad for Virgin, I jumped for joy.  I went pretty high and when I saw the price, I dropped like a ston- no, boulder.  The thing is $649.99!  I couldn't fathom why this phone was so much so I checked at the Apple Store Online.  They have the same phone for the same price.  The reason it's so pricey is that it's unlocked.  This means it will work with any carrier that isn't Sprint or Verizon. Those you absolutely have to have contracts with.

Virgin isn't carrying them.  They're just... telling people that they can buy unlocked iPhones that will work with their service!


No matter- I still want it.  The only issue is that to get that much money, it will take at least a year!  I don't know if my bundle of scraps will last that long and I don't want to go that long with it.  The sooner it's gone, the better.  To see if I could earn some cash, I checked out those sites that buy your cell phones.

Do you know how much they will pay for my piece of dung?  Twelve measly dollars.

Literally, FML.  My grandmother suggests that I save up for a phone instead of a ferret, but... that still doesn't help me!  I can't wait for a whole year before getting a new phone!  Since Virgin Mobile is a no-contract provider, there aren't any upgrade reward plans or anything like AT&T had.  I'm screwed and have no clue what to do.

Even if my grandparents can scrounge up $100, my mom pitches in $100 as well as my dad, I'll only be half way there!  I know my other grandma won't help (she barely acknowledges my existence) and my aunt is in less than a stable situation.  My sisters just got jobs so they're no help and... I'm screwed.  Did I already say that?  If so, it's the truth!

I'd need to raise $350 on my own and... so tight... such terrible... FML.

Goodnight.